Tattoo on Friday...

I went to have my back tattoo finished on Friday. It is all done now in my back, well I think it is anyway :-). Anyway, when I was "under the needle" so to speak, and enduring a bit of pain in the muscle areas had a couple of thoughts that I would like to share today.

First an advice...

If you do have a tattoo done, being too lean is a hindrance... The areas that hurt the most were on my traps, which are pure muscle, whilst the areas that were fine and less painful, and strangely pleasurable, were actually over the bone, which is usually an area that most people don't enjoy...

The other is to do with pain & pleasure

As you know, I firmly believe that pain and pleasure is the principle that rules all of our lives, we either spend our time avoiding pain or seeking pleasure. And it can be argued that the successful people in life are the ones that are prepared to endure the perceived potential pain of doing something because the pleasure at the end is worthwhile!

And tattoos are the perfect example

When you decide to do a tattoo, you know that there will be pain in the process, but the pleasure of having your tattoo done, is, in your eyes, worth the pain. So you endure the pain and you go for it "all guns blazing" because you truly want your pleasure at the end.

Same applies with cosmetic surgery

I haven't had cosmetic surgery but I would venture my opinion that the people that do it, do it due to the pain that they endure from whatever area they are not happy with in their bodies at that moment and because of the enormous perceived pleasure they will have about themselves once the treatment is done.

We can delve deeper into the psychologic ramifications of the process, but at a basic simple level is all about pain and pleasure. In this case there is two different kinds of pain; the one you endure at the moment from not being happy with yourself and the one from the surgery itself!

And because you want the pleasure at the end hard enough and you want to get rid of the current pain you are experiencing you will endure the surgery, the pain from it and also the pain from the recovery process to experience the pleasure of feeling better about your body!

Losing weight is in the same boat

When you embark on a "weight loss" quest, you know from the start that there will be some pain and some challenges ahead, but you persevere throughout because you really want the pleasure of having a fantastic toned body at the end. It is all about pain and pleasure and how much you really want the pleasure!

Whatever goal you have

Always remember, there will be pain along the way, there will be challenges, obstacles, problems and difficult situations, but if your goal is big enough, powerful enough and important enough to you, then you will be able to endure all that life "throws" at you and achieve your goal and enjoy the pleasure at the end!

Have a brilliant day!

Speak soon,

Paulo

x

Cravings...

One of the biggest challenges that my Physical Excellence Coaching clients have is controlling their cravings. Some of them crave chocolates or donuts, others crave crisps or pizzas, but they all have a hard time controlling these cravings. They start by trying to ignore it, to put it out of their minds and forget about it.

The problem about that, is that the more you try to ignore something, the more you think off it! This is to do with how your subconscious processes thoughts. Your subconscious mind is one of the most powerful "tools" for your success in achieving your goals and you need to learn how to use it.

But it is a flawed tool though.

And the good news is that you can use this flaw to your advantage. You see the subconscious mind, can not differentiate between reality and imagination, and the negative words are not processed at all. You can use the inability to differentiate between reality and imagination to your advantage by constantly visualising yourself the way you want to be and because of that your subconscious will "see it" as reality.

Therefore the more you see yourself with a 6-pack the more your mind believes it as true and will continuously "instruct" your body to achieve that 6-pack thus acting as if you have the 6-pack already! Hence the reason I advise you to not only be positive in your goals but also to do every thing at your disposal to continuously remember it, using vision boards, reading it out loud, doing mind movies, whatever is at your disposal.

How about the other flaw?

Well as your subconscious doesn't really process the negatives, when you say to yourself, "I can't have that chocolate bar" or "I don't want that packet of crisps" what your subconscious is actually hearing is "I can have that chocolate bar" and "I want that packet of crisps" and the more and more it hears this, the more it will want it and crave it and eventually your conscious mind will succumb to it!

So what should you do?

The advice I give my clients and indeed I follow myself is to use the following simple 3 step process:

1 - Acknowledge your craving

You want a chocolate bar. Acknowledge that is what you want and feel like eating. Don't even attempt to forget about it!

2 - Analyse the craving against your goal

If your chocolate bar has 200 calories, and if you eat it, how much more miles do you have to run or how many more hours do you need to lift weights to burn that extra bar of chocolate? Compare the bar of chocolate against your 6-pack. See your perfect body in your mind and how further away from it are you if you eat the chocolate bar.

3 - Decide if fulfilling the craving is worth it

Make your decision, you know by now what the consequences of eating that chocolate are. Are they really worth it? Is the 30 seconds of eating the bar worth the extra 1 or 2 hours you have to spend in the gym that day, just to burn the extra calories that you fed your body with?

By following this process

You will deal with your craving and not even be tempted to fulfill it due to the extra perceived pain you will suffer to achieve your goal. The first time you do this process it might take a minute or more to deal with it, but with time this process will be so quick that you will deal with your cravings almost instantly.

You can use this process with all your craving, physical and emotional ones. Simply acknowledge it, compare it to your goal and make the decision. Simple!

Have a brilliant day!

Speak soon,

Paulo

I can't change you!

Have you ever had one of those argh moments where you wished you could change someone else? It probably was your partner or your kids or a close friend. I bet you did, I have had many of those moments myself. Where someone's actions, or lack off, or words, really infuriated me and I wished they would change so that they could do what they wanted or dreamed off.

And then you tell them they need to change...

At that time, you probably have actually told them that they had to change because the way they were or are, is not the right atittude to have or be. I also bet that your words or actions had little or no effect on them or what they did about their life.

Am I right? Well the reason behind all that is that I can't really change anyone else or indeed you. No one can change you. Only you can change! The best way I can describe this is being using the example of a celebrity addicted to some kind of destructive substance.

Is it time for you to go into "rehab"?

Have you ever noticed that when you hear that Celebrity X went into rehab, that the only time that said Celebrity does kick his or her habit is when they themselves want to do it? If it was their PR, manager, family or friends that "forced" them to go into rehab, they, soon or later, end up using again?

That is because they didn't wanted to change or saw any reason to change. If they are not prepared to go through the trials and tribulations of actually undergo change they will not do it. They will sabotage themselves along the way because in their own subconscious they don't want to change!

Pain and pleasure

As I mentioned before in these pages, most of our life is governed by the pain and pleasure principle, I would even venture to say that all that we do in life is about pain and pleasure. Actually is more about the perceived pain and the perceived pleasure!

What do I mean by perceived?

Well when you are about to undergo change, you are in a state of pain, and you know already that you need to change. Now to achieve change you know in your mind all the perceived pain that will come your way, but if you also already know the great pleasure that is expecting you at the end of the process.

You will change when the perceived pleasure at the end of the process is so much greater than the perceived pain you will endure during the process that is worth while! When you are "forced" into a change process, then you only perceive the pain and don't really see the pleasure that might come into your life, so you will not put yourself into a position of strength and positive mindeset to actually undergo the process.

You will have thoughts what is the point of it all? Why am I doing this? And so on and so forth. So if you see yourself in a position that you feel that you need to change someone else, do not attempt to force that change. Instead talk to him or her to understand if they really feel that they need to change.

Do they really need to change?

If they admit it to you and are really sure about it, they will soon embark on that change and then you can become part of their support team. If they don't then you need to understand what they are saying and leave them be to make their own decision. You then need to decide how will that affect your life, and if you are to continue to be part of their life.

Why do you want them to change?

The other aspect that you need to address, is why do you want them to change? Are you trying to change someone for your benefit or for their benefit? If it is to fit into your life, then you are not being a good friend, because you are trying to mould them to you, rather than look for their wellbeing.

If they changed since you know them and are now a different person and that is destructive for them, then your support and concern is justifiable, but if they changed and they are happy with who they are, then you are the one that either has to change or step away from them.

You have the power...

You have the power to change the most important person in your life, yourself!!! Use your power to make changes in your life or within you for your benefit and you will not only achieve your goals but also you will be completely and truly happy!

Have a brilliant day!

Speak soon,

Paulo